.Are you struggling with relationships? Finding the right man or woman? Are you in a cycle of bad friendships? Do you need more understanding and revelation about it? Let’s dive in to what the Bible says about relationships and how God wants us to approach them.
Have you ever wondered if the partner you’re seeking or pursuing is what God would want? In 2 Corinthians, Paul writes to the church of Corinth about them having relationships with unrighteous people. He is concerned more about fellowship not specifically romantic relationships. Paul speaks of being unequally yoked in 2 Corinthians 6:14 KJV “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?”
Now you can be unequally yoked in the world and in the house of God. You have to remember that everyone that attends church is not always saved. From a Worldly standpoint, Paul wrote to the church in 2 Corinthians 6:14 because a lot of believers were mingling with unbelievers. Now let’s not get this confused with ministering to an unbeliever. Evangelism and fellowship with someone are very different. If that person is intrigued to listen and hear about Christ; minister to them. But you hanging around an atmosphere of darkness with no intention to minister is unrighteousness.
What communion hath light with darkness? Communion means oneness and agreement. You have to do your research on who you are around. Take your time to know who you are dealing with. This goes for fellowship as well as relationships. Have you ever found yourself friends with someone for five, ten, or fifteen years and something goes completely wrong or you figure out they aren’t who they said they were? We rush too much to form these fellowships but don’t take time to dissect who people really are and what they stand for. And we find ourselves in unequally yoked fellowship and hurt time and time again.
Now let’s take a look at how 2 Corinthians 6:14 relates to relationships even in the house of God. Some women in church date men outside the church who are not saved. Why? Many are in relationships before they get saved and find it hard to break away emotionally. Some women feel that though their man is unsaved they can pray him into the church. Some women feel that men in the church are no different than men on the outside when it comes to wanting sexual relations before marriage. And on the flip side of that coin, some women feel that church men are too rigid and don’t allow women to know them outside of their walk with Christ. The problem with this is that; there is no accountability for the mate you choose to date outside of the church. There is no leader for counsel, direction, correction, or instruction. Often times men and women began to replace God with those mates outside of church because of the lack of accountability. If they are causing you to fall in your relationship with God, it is not always easy to cut it off because they do not live by the same doctrine.
Now let’s look at why men often don’t want to date women in the church. At times it’s easier for them to do what they want to do like premarital sex, manipulation, etc because they don’t have to be held accountable if she doesn’t attend the church and she also isn’t held accountable to anyone. Other men don’t have attraction for women that are in church because they might feel that these women are somewhat 'holier than thou' and dress and act prude. This does not mean they want women to be naked but there is a way to look attractive and still maintain your modesty as a Christian woman.
Also, just like some women felt that they were unable to get to the person outside of their walk with Christ, men do also feel this way. You can’t be so heavenly bound that you're no earthly good. Most times there is a BIG pressure to get married in the church. Usually courtship is leading to marriage and some men feel women are rushing them down the aisle to altar, as soon as, the relationship is established. The men then feel pressured to get mentally and financially stable right away. Often times outside the church, they don’t have those pressures.
Well you ask, what about those saved men and women who want to date in the church? Now, you must realize that even if both the man and woman are saved, it doesn’t mean they should be together. Instead, the questions you should be asking and praying to God about are: Do you have a destiny or purpose together? Where God has him or her going, is that where God has you going as well? You need to be praying in your dating stage for clarity of purpose for this union.
The most important message of all is to be seeking God First. If you are not praying, you will be blinded with the wants of the flesh. Whether in fellowship or relationships, it is important to do your research. Take your time and unravel the many layers there are present in people. Always, keep asking God for purpose and revelation. This will save you years of hurt and frustration dealing with unequally yoked individuals. Always be in a constant state of reflection to understand why you are even attracting certain people to your life. Know who you are in God and what you stand for. And remember also, even if people are saved it doesn’t mean God’s destiny is for them to be a part of your life. God Bless